The Art of Turning On

Photo by ETHAN HOOEVER, Unsplash. Turning on is a bit like ligtning a sparkler - The difference being that being turned on can be self-renewing

Photo by ETHAN HOOEVER, Unsplash. Turning on is a bit like ligtning a sparkler - The difference being that being turned on can be self-renewing

After a necessary Summer break, I’m back and there are so many juicy things unfolding. Three weeks ago, I started the sixth course of Awakening Feminine Leadership, and it turns me on to no end to hold these courses. Sometimes I believe I derive an equal amount of pleasure, if not more:), as the participants’. I love seeing how desire, turn-on, eros, and the jewel power grow in each and every one. I love seeing how the feminine awakens together with an inner turn, with becoming more true, while the participants take up more space, asking for what they want and setting clear boundaries. I also love working with women individually, helping them go into their bodies and into their depth and be curious about their emotional universe being expressed through the body. I also love what my colleagues and I are creating in the area of women turning on in the business world, and how the power of feminine leadership and turn-on is spreading!

The Art Of Turning On

The participants, and I:), connect with Eros, go inside and we find our turn-on. It’s as simple as that. Even though most of us need help to get going, there is no better way than to do it with other women who also are turning on. It’s highly contagious and it comes with many pleasurable benefits!

So what is a turn-on?

What it is not

- It is not about looking sexy or sensual according to an observer.
- It is not the same as being happy, even though when you are turned-on, you usually are. A turn-on doesn’t mean that the rest of our lives is hunky-dory. Few of us live in a reality where that is true, but we see our lives through a different lens and we are capable of being more present to what is there.
- A turn-on is not related to having sex either, which many believe, even when it does coincide, it ups the game and adds much more sparkle and depth. Many women have sex without being turned-on just to be “nice” or “taking one for the team”, because there is trauma or because many of us didn’t learn how to ask for what we want and take a stand for our needs (and for many, the first step is identifying those needs).
- A turn-on isn’t about being horny in the traditional sense either, even though it feels similar.
- A turn-on is related to activating the sexual energy, and it is an inside job. However, people will know when you are turned on because they sense that particular form of aliveness. If you dislike or even hate yourself, are sad, or depressed, it’s a longer path, but with practice and by being around other turned-on women, the journey can be cut short.

What it is

- A turn-on is about being juicy, alive, having that twinkle in your eye and it’s about being lit up on the inside, like a sparkler, where the sexual energy is activated.
The easiest way to learn how to turn on is by being around other turned-on women.
- It is also essential to be connected to your jewel (aka yoni, aka vagina). Connected neurologically, but mostly it’s about having struck up a friendship and an appreciation with and for her, and that you learn how your jewel prefers to experience pleasure.
- A turn-on, when activated can come from dancing naked to your favorite music, taking a bath, with presence, seeing the water drops on your skin, or dancing, clothes optional. Even your scratchy elbow can be part of your turn-on.
- The closer we are to our bodies and our senses, with an appreciation, and that there is a spark of sexual energy, we get turned on. Which includes how we show up in a boardroom.

Turn-on as an essential aspect of our soul

Another way of describing what a turn-on is, is that it is an essential aspect of our soul that gets activated and that it is in fact on a different frequency, which is connected to the jewel. It makes life easier, and more pleasurable, which then supports us in being more capable of accepting things as they are. While we also need a connection with our belly-center, our heart, and soul, being turned-on, especially with other turned-on women, makes life sparkly. It’s like moving from rain to sunshine, or from a black-and-white film to one in technicolor, or from a bare light-bulb to an ocean of candles, or like being in love, where you are the significant other. Finally, a turn-on is also directly connected to Eros, or an expression of Eros, which I’ll write about next.

I’ve lived most of my life being turned off, since I’ve lived in my head, was forward-oriented instead of being present and either hated my body or just disliked it. Even now I can lose my turn-on completely, like this Summer when I felt depleted. A turn-on isn’t there all the time either, even when I’m more present, but there are ways how to create a practice around it. I’m sharing this, because I believe it’s important to understand that we can lose our turn-on - and we can find our way back. It doesn’t matter how many times we forget. She is always there. Ready for us to wake up.

So turning-on is an art-form, but when we know how to turn-on, especially in the company of other turned-on women, we can find our way back home.

What turns you on? What celebratory, presence- and pleasure-filled sensual activities can you do to support your turn-on this weekend?

Love and truth,